My sister has never seen a Batman movie.

July 28, 2012 § Leave a comment

So, yeah. Yesterday (just before I went to see The Dark Knight Rises) my 12 (almost 13) year-old sister told me she had never seen any of the Batman films. And not just the new ones, but the old ones as well. It’s a concept I can’t quite grasp – probably because I grew up watching the Tim Burton version, on the telly on Saturday afternoons, or because I was slightly obsessed with Arnold Schwarzenegger back in the day so I watched that horrible one-we-shall-not-name far too many times before Batman’s nipples started bothering me.

Batman is probably my favourite superhero. We can go into the argument that ‘he’s not really a superhero because he doesn’t have super powers’. Well, fuck off. His super power is that he’s filthy rich and super intelligent and shut up because it does count.

It’s not just because Batman was darker and more mysterious than other superheroes, that came later, because I read the comics and paid attention to the story. Back when I was around 10 years-old (that’s the 90s by the way), Batman had a few movies out there, the brilliant Batman: The Animated Series and I occasionally caught up the old 60s TV show on late nights (along with Wonder Woman with Lynda Carter and the Hulk series). Good times.

I guess it was all a bit of determinism why I became to be a Batman fan as I was exposed to it so much. Also, I was a bit of a morbid teenager, I was very (and by very, I mean very) fond of Jack the Ripper stuff, Agatha Christie’s books as well as Sherlock Holmes’ stories. So maybe because Batman had a bit of detective to himself, I liked him so much.

It’s weird then, to realize that my sister (who is right now watching Batman Begins – courtesy of my DVD collection) will not experience the Tim Burton movies which I truly believe led the way to the superhero franchises of today. She will never have chills going down her spine whenever she sees a dead fish because she remembers the Penguin eating a raw one in the scene that has disturbed me the most in all of the Batman movies so far. She will have Anne Hathaway’s badass Catwoman, but not the sexy goddess that was Pfeiffer (therefore it’s unlikely she will dream of having a vinyl catsuit and vinyl boots to go along like I did – and yes I eventually bought vinyl boots but never wore them). But hey, at least she won’t have Batman with nipples (although I admit I love the Batcard joke in the Batman & Robin movie). She will have brilliant the Heath Ledger as the Joker, which I truly believe owned up to the character more than Jack Nicholson ever did when it comes to making me scared or nervous (and I was a child then, so allegedly easier impressed).

Much to my sadness, it reflects a sad reality: my Star Wars was that of the Phantom Menace. My dad (thank FUCK) was a fan of the old ones and made me watch it, but after went on raving afterwards about how the originals were better and I went there and watched the old ones before Episodes II and III came out. Thankfully, my sister has gotten the better of from this similar situations, because she has the Nolan brilliance to show her who Batman is in the big screen and all I got was fucking Jar Jar Binks.

PS.: Proud geek daughter fact: my dad took my mom to a Star Wars-all nighter for their first date.


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